I like to think of myself as a realistic optimist. Most times at least. I have a boyfriend. I know I ALWAYS say this. But this time, I promise I’m being sincere. Despite the fact, I always find myself in this sort of entanglement -the coffee date.
Date them all, milk that single life
Wahura Kabutha
I like the smell of brewed coffee, the dining and the atmosphere, but I always feel that I eat better at home. I dine out only when my social life requires it, whenever I can though, I avoid it.
The waiter brings over our order. I ordered for mocha although I just wanted some tea. Some good hot ginger tea. It doesn’t matter. All restaurants are the same: ostentatious presentation. Had I asked for tea, they’d serve a whole tea pot.
“You are beautiful, even without make up.”
Even without make up?! Really! Isn’t saying you’re beautiful enough?!
“Thank you.”
What I want to say though “must be the great sex I’ve been having!” It wouldn’t be brute. He does know I have a man. It is the first thing I say when a guy asks me out. Lol
It starts out as general small talk with good intentions, some quick-witted comments here and there. Little by little, in order to advance his agenda: to get laid, the conversation becomes annoyingly uncomfortable. Yet I still remain seated and drink from my cup. Why? I do it for the same reason I do everything I do: I just wanted to get out of a rut.
He grins seductively after seeing me check him out- only I wasn’t checking him out the way he thinks I was. In my mind, I was wondering how many times that body has been pressed against a girl that wasn’t his. He is clearly the type that disregards boundaries and cheats.
As if on cue, my phone pings. It’s a text message from my boyfriend. (I’m gonna my boyfriend y’all to death) Don’t make me wait too long, I won’t let you cum otherwise. I don’t reply. I don’t need to. He already knows about this Coffee date. He wasn’t happy about it of course, but he trusts me. In any case we have a ‘cleansing’ tradition, after every such date.
My date starts talking about money despite the fact I asked nothing about it, but he talks anyway. He has an enormous need to say he isn’t poor, that he can maintain his lifestyle for decades to come. I don’t know for how long he has been talking, but at some point I stop listening. My mind drifts to the text I just received. Taking the time to savour the attraction between us, the delicious and provocative edge of danger he exudes even in a simple text. I think of our cleansing tradition. It’s simple: anytime, anyplace and anyway. He calls the shots, I let him. If I’m being honest this is the part of my date I look forward to most. He gets a ‘quick’ release and I get a little of what I desire: thrill.
I shouldn’t be here any longer. Besides, I’ve already finished my cup of coffee. I thank him for the coffee date and turn to get my coat. “Are you free this evening? We could get a drink and see where the night leads us,” he suggests. It’s not the first time this has happened. In fact, it’s almost a given with me. Even though I show up without putting much effort into my look, even though I inform them of my unavailability. The men…oh, the men! They do everything they can to inflate my sense of self. Maybe because of my tiny body, they assume I have the flexibility of a nineteen-year-old Romanian gymnast and could do all manner of crazy in the bedroom.
I’m tempted to remind him I have a boyfriend. Instead, I thank him for the invitation and say I already have plans. I’m all too eager to leave and it’s of no use anyway.
, JOIN OUR
Very good read, i feel sorry for the guy tho. I mean, his only fault was believing he can overcome your sense of complacency with your guy, a futile effort but one that should be marked as an act of confidence.
Confidence is attractive. Over confidence…not so much
I guess we have the same eyes, they don’t look at you, they look through you and see your intentions from a mile away
This is a masterpiece 🤗 The “I have a boyfriend” barely works these days though 😂😂😂
This is beautiful… the control is just superb
Thank you babes ❤️
Cleansing tradition..
Great read.
Tea served with a slice of titillation, brilliant❤️.
Glad this made its way to my inbox.
Ha ha, so what’s the cleansing tradition?
Can we get about 538 pages please? ❤❤
I hear you ❤️
This is so damn lovely. I’m in awe, and at a loss for words.
You flatter me too much ❤️
Haha. Cleansing tradition huh? 🤔🤔🤔🤔 Please do share. I must say you have an interesting relationship with your man. The trust wow. Also I agree, the I have a boyfriend line doesn’t work these days. Somebody suggested acting like you are after money is a quicker way to get guys off you. Also where do men get the courage to meet you and want to spend the night with you on the very first date. It’s so fucking annoying. The read was lovely as always.
Love the read. Do for toxic relationships next ❤️❤️
Toxic relationships have the best sex 😜 I’ll try think of something along these lines.
Great work over here😁😁keep up
Thank you. I’m humbled
But babe, I have a boyfriend doesn’t work 😂😂. But yes, please remind us you have one😂🙆🙆
Yaaaaas, he is my booooooooyfriend.
I second about the 538pages more so on the cleansing tradition…good read though
In that case, I’d better start scheming and plotting asap.
Love it… I wish it was longer though, maybe include the cleansing traditions 😝😝
BEHIND THE SCENES
I’ve read the comments and I feel I didn’t really communicate like I’d have liked to. The guy at the date isn’t a ‘victim’. There are dates that go really well despite either being in a relationship.
For this article I felt inclined to make this a ‘bad coffee date’ cause I’m a biased human being. I’m not really as optimistic as I said earlier, in fact I’m the complete opposite. I will find the ‘evil’ in you before noticing the good.
I have been on a date and the guy asked me “where did you school?” After giving my answer. He proceeds to ask, “was it a national school before you joined or after?!” I said , “before” he nodded and made a grumpy sound. Almost as if he was shocked or couldn’t believe me rather. So yes, I wanted payback. I wanted to stick it a little to the male specie. Because how dare he?! Doesn’t he realise I can be both beautiful and smart.
What I really wanted to focus on however, is the fact that being in a relationship should not stop you from going out and meeting new people. You might just meet your soul mate or your twin flame. Assuming they actually exist.
I also wanted to reassure the guys who date ‘a woman that goes out on dates despite being in a relationship’ it’s never really about the person they’re meeting. No offense but He/she could just be a pawn in your ‘love’ story. I choose to quote this because not all relationships are based on love.
Like I said, I have had casual meet ups with guys and half of the time, I was thinking of my significant other. Which is why I chose to write this article from my personal perspective.
It takes guts to admit defeat and failure. And I’m no coward. I have failed. From basing this article on my personal life I shifted the focus from what is important. (You’d think this is a matter of life and death) It’s important to understand that one can’t always say no. You need to say yes. Yes to life. Yes to that date that will probably end up being bad. Men are men after all.
One can always reach a compromise with their loved one. If someone truly loves you, I believe they would want you to have the freedom to go out as long as you maintain your boundaries. Also don’t be that boring and jealous partner. The world is full of life and thrills. Find a reason to play dirty once in a while.
xoxo
Ooooh @Madamealpha
The story is more than interesting.
You could have accepted the invitation and see where the night could lead…..I was curious on that 😁
😂😂😂I think we all know how this would have ended. Alcohol and bad decisions. Same WhatsApp group.
Amazing… just amazing.. wow.
Lizzzzzzzzzzs this is real talent right there 🔥